1. |
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You ask me these questions, like I’m the one to answer
You ask me to do these things, like I should know how to do them
You tell me all these things, like you’re the one to always be right
You pretend to listen to me, like you really care what I think or say
Goddamn these mixed feelings, that come and go all the time
Why you gotta go and get yourself into more trouble than you’re worth
I’m still just waiting here for you, you never came back home
For me to tell you how much I love…
You tell me that your world is crashing down upon you
Like I’m supposed to come and help save you
Goddamn these mixed feelings, that come and go all the time
Why you gotta go and get yourself into more trouble than you’re worth
I’m still just waiting here for you, you never came back home
For me to tell you how much I love…
You got your head up, in those clouds so high
I don’t know if you’re ever coming back
You got your head up, so far in those black skies
Now I know that you’re never coming home
You let me know that the whole world is coming to its end
All I have to say now is it’s not soon enough
Goddamn these mixed feelings, that come and go all the time
Why you gotta go and get yourself into more trouble than you’re worth
I’m still just waiting here for you, you never came back home
For me to tell you how much I love…
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2. |
Liar/Paranoia
04:21
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Are you sleeping well, fairy; can you hear us barely
You are not alone, canary; are you listening carefully
Do you hear yourself, alive; do you want to deprive
Trust me, you’ll survive; just take the nose-dive
Do you hate alone; when will you atone
Your mind, disown; your fear, overblown
Freedom is a lazy way of seeing control
Annoyance is an easy way of saying you’re old
Tired in the current way of being depressed
Hatred is the true way that you see yourself
LIAR - LIAR - LIAR
Listen to the world again; you think you will ascend
Your heart will bend; kill your bullshit, amen
Die away from others; make sure no one bothers
Swing away the covers; lift eternal lovers
Freedom is a lazy way of seeing control
Annoyance is an easy way of saying you’re old
Tired in the current way of being depressed
Hatred is the true way that you see yourself
LIAR - LIAR - LIAR
Paranoia, paranoia, I am living in paranoia
Self-flagellation, personal gratification, I am living depreciation
Paranoia, paranoia, I am living in paranoia
Freedom is a lazy way of seeing control
Annoyance is an easy way of saying you’re old
Tired in the current way of being depressed
Hatred is the true way that you see yourself
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3. |
Fractured Mentality
05:31
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You are asking for fun; while I eat alone
Yelling and screaming; I’m waiting on my phone
Maybe I should try; maybe I should change
Possibly I could find; new meaning in strange
I have my geocentric - I have my egocentric - I have my eccentric
I waste my uniformic - I waste my geriatric - I waste my psychiatric
Luck was never on my side; changed faster than a sweetener
Pain followed me everywhere; I see you go and beat her
Maybe I lie to myself; maybe I could speak up
Possibly I’ll stare past; never forgive the cup
I have my geocentric - I have my egocentric - I have my eccentric
I waste my uniformic - I waste my geriatric - I waste my psychiatric
Fractured mentality - excuse for a life
Fractured mentality - cut it with a knife
Fractured mentality - lie of my time
Fractured mentality - never forgive the dime
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4. |
Scars and Marks
04:00
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Let’s have a feast; dine together
Healthy life, love; my most favorite leather
Bumps in the night and bites in the dark
Knives out in fright; leaving a mark
You’re my meal; victim phenobarbitone
Featured testosterone; fucking androsterone
Act like a clone, just for your royal throne
Feed you rotenone; wear your skin and backbone
Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone
Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone
I will dine with you, while I’m by myself
Bathtub is red; it will drink itself
Turn to me and look me in my eyes
Feel my tears, listen to my cries
Search for me into; never ends in view
Knocked, I thought you knew; giving deja vu
Make us a brand new; something from me and you
Shall I misconstrue; just something new
Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone
Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone
Feed yourself now; pure, plump, free
Clean in my sink; my own amicus curiae
I sign with nom de plume; mark you with signum
Symbols and names for crypts and tomb
Slice and dice and cut; my mirror a mutt
Give me the gamut; run my mind, Lilliput
Smash the occiput, life will now cut
Fuck your brain with my mind, open/shut
Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone
Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone
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5. |
Introspection
03:51
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Shit on my brain; fuck my mind
Kill this train; end my own kind
Forget your life and enter something
Dye your cord; your words mean nothing
Never look back; never live forward
Mental attack; frontal-lobe mis-chord
End my hope; cut my bind
Load up on dope; what else to find
Fuck my heart and forget something
Hang from the door; your words mean nothing
Seeping through the pores; thoughts are mental whores
Red rain falling for truth; actions are uncouth
Tears from a cloud; pretend you’re proud
Fashion a new knife; pressure completes the life
Fall apart into broken whole and true
Forget your purposeful word; just watch the bird
Self-hatred is true; look in the mirror, “fuck you”
Self-fulfilling prophecy; internal clairvoyancy
No tears left to hide; furious sky
My honesty lied; season pay-no-mind
Tangled in time; feast to dine
Ignore the past; forget to cast
Push the nail all through my skin
Past the muscles, through to sin
Shit on my brain; fuck my mind
Kill this train; end my own kind
Forget your life and enter something
Dye your cord; your words mean nothing
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6. |
Realistic Ideals
03:12
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Heaven brings me closer to you
Away from peace and towards the fool
Like a beaten elephant loosely tied to a stick
I’m not going anywhere, I’ve yet my trick
In hell of my own creation
Through to the tent of my imagination
Like a whipped ring-master of a flea circus
Take your opinions, destroy my esophagus
Heaven brings me closer to you
Away from peace and towards the fool
Like a beaten elephant loosely tied to a stick
I’m not going anywhere, I’ve yet my trick
Hatred bred unto sheep
Live in fear, eternal keep
Lying is a paying business
Seething while stealing realness
Simple shelter, roots of wrong
I’m not sure, rope looks long
Explanation determination
Never spiteful elation
Pragmatic reasoning of actions
Heartless religious factions
Creativity stolen from the youth
Dogmatic ideas are your truth
Heaven brings me closer to you
Away from peace and towards the fool
Like a beaten elephant loosely tied to a stick
I’m not going anywhere, I’ve yet my trick
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7. |
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Flying is a construct of the mind
Sleeping is a dream of a coma
Bleeding, an invention of the body
Dying is a creation of a life
If I jump, will you catch me? If I cut, will you heal me?
If I swing, will you lower me? If I die, will you help me?
Spinning is a construct of the world
Fainting is a creation of pressure
Experience is an invention of a system
Hurting, an occurrence of the living
If you free me, am I still me? Does “myself” mean anything?
Do I stand for something? Do I fall for nothing?
Figment of imagination; I’m no longer living
Questions left unanswered are facts; facts left unquestioned are lies
Martyrdom is self-indulgence
Suicide is an example
GO!
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8. |
A#2
06:09
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I feel myself fly up - all back from the abyss
Another empty cup - I feel my own sweet kiss
I fly above my head - I see myself so calm
Peaceful like a body, dead - I know I won’t see dawn
I know what’s coming now - I feel it in my heart
But no more I can grow - a pin prick like a dart
A bottle rests beside me - standing stretched and tall
I know that I won’t be free - no matter how far I crawl
Someone dies every second
I guess I will be beckoned
I don’t know the words to my sad song
Even though I know it won’t be long
I fall back to myself - I fall for miles
I awake with a jolt - surrounded by my lies
Though I think my mind’s a fiend - grab the bottle next to me
Swallow all seventeen - you will sleep like a baby
Someone dies every second
I guess I will be beckoned
I don’t know the words to my sad song
Even though I know it won’t be long
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9. |
Demon
05:16
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Goddamn, I trusted you; though you built our feud
You never told the truth; fought the wrong side, bone and tooth
Shared our true thoughts; turned my heart in knots
Agreed with every word you said; didn’t know your mind was led
I followed all your hopes and dreams
Believed in all your selfish teens
I know that you didn’t believe it
I really turned, collect your spit
You lied to her; you lied to us
But we never took the time to make the honest fuss
Your beliefs were wrong; you are not insane
You do it all just for the fame
I followed all your hopes and dreams
Believed in all your selfish teens
I know that you didn’t believe it
I really turned, collect your spit
I followed all your hopes and dreams
Believed in all your selfish teens
I know that you didn’t believe it
I really turned, collect your spit
I followed all your hopes and dreams
Believed in all your selfish teens
I know that you didn’t believe it
I really turned, collect your spit
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10. |
Freedom of a Beggar
05:25
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Ask for everything when you can lose
Soon you will, all that you can use
Rose-tint my world in a shade of green
Now you can’t speak, you are the queen
Freedom is a point of view
Your locked jail is true
I do believe you owe me what’s due
Freedom is a point of view
The distance is minuscule
Spacious difference is infinite
There seems to be more space
Between minds across the universe
I will keep you hidden away
For you’re molded straight from clay
Oh my dearest, hopeless doll
I will never allow you to fall
Freedom is a point of view
Your locked jail is true
I do believe you owe me what’s due
Freedom is a point of view
My poetry is meaningless
On the scale of everything
There is more to life
Than simple passing
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Hereditary SNAFU Chicago, Illinois
Fully independent artist and musician.
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