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Belt Buckles & Pill Bottles

by Hereditary SNAFU

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1.
You ask me these questions, like I’m the one to answer You ask me to do these things, like I should know how to do them You tell me all these things, like you’re the one to always be right You pretend to listen to me, like you really care what I think or say Goddamn these mixed feelings, that come and go all the time Why you gotta go and get yourself into more trouble than you’re worth I’m still just waiting here for you, you never came back home For me to tell you how much I love… You tell me that your world is crashing down upon you Like I’m supposed to come and help save you Goddamn these mixed feelings, that come and go all the time Why you gotta go and get yourself into more trouble than you’re worth I’m still just waiting here for you, you never came back home For me to tell you how much I love… You got your head up, in those clouds so high I don’t know if you’re ever coming back You got your head up, so far in those black skies Now I know that you’re never coming home You let me know that the whole world is coming to its end All I have to say now is it’s not soon enough Goddamn these mixed feelings, that come and go all the time Why you gotta go and get yourself into more trouble than you’re worth I’m still just waiting here for you, you never came back home For me to tell you how much I love…
2.
Are you sleeping well, fairy; can you hear us barely You are not alone, canary; are you listening carefully Do you hear yourself, alive; do you want to deprive Trust me, you’ll survive; just take the nose-dive Do you hate alone; when will you atone Your mind, disown; your fear, overblown Freedom is a lazy way of seeing control Annoyance is an easy way of saying you’re old Tired in the current way of being depressed Hatred is the true way that you see yourself LIAR - LIAR - LIAR Listen to the world again; you think you will ascend Your heart will bend; kill your bullshit, amen Die away from others; make sure no one bothers Swing away the covers; lift eternal lovers Freedom is a lazy way of seeing control Annoyance is an easy way of saying you’re old Tired in the current way of being depressed Hatred is the true way that you see yourself LIAR - LIAR - LIAR Paranoia, paranoia, I am living in paranoia Self-flagellation, personal gratification, I am living depreciation Paranoia, paranoia, I am living in paranoia Freedom is a lazy way of seeing control Annoyance is an easy way of saying you’re old Tired in the current way of being depressed Hatred is the true way that you see yourself
3.
You are asking for fun; while I eat alone Yelling and screaming; I’m waiting on my phone Maybe I should try; maybe I should change Possibly I could find; new meaning in strange I have my geocentric - I have my egocentric - I have my eccentric I waste my uniformic - I waste my geriatric - I waste my psychiatric Luck was never on my side; changed faster than a sweetener Pain followed me everywhere; I see you go and beat her Maybe I lie to myself; maybe I could speak up Possibly I’ll stare past; never forgive the cup I have my geocentric - I have my egocentric - I have my eccentric I waste my uniformic - I waste my geriatric - I waste my psychiatric Fractured mentality - excuse for a life Fractured mentality - cut it with a knife Fractured mentality - lie of my time Fractured mentality - never forgive the dime
4.
Let’s have a feast; dine together Healthy life, love; my most favorite leather Bumps in the night and bites in the dark Knives out in fright; leaving a mark You’re my meal; victim phenobarbitone Featured testosterone; fucking androsterone Act like a clone, just for your royal throne Feed you rotenone; wear your skin and backbone Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone I will dine with you, while I’m by myself Bathtub is red; it will drink itself Turn to me and look me in my eyes Feel my tears, listen to my cries Search for me into; never ends in view Knocked, I thought you knew; giving deja vu Make us a brand new; something from me and you Shall I misconstrue; just something new Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone Feed yourself now; pure, plump, free Clean in my sink; my own amicus curiae I sign with nom de plume; mark you with signum Symbols and names for crypts and tomb Slice and dice and cut; my mirror a mutt Give me the gamut; run my mind, Lilliput Smash the occiput, life will now cut Fuck your brain with my mind, open/shut Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone Fry me - kill me - light me - dine me - all alone
5.
Shit on my brain; fuck my mind Kill this train; end my own kind Forget your life and enter something Dye your cord; your words mean nothing Never look back; never live forward Mental attack; frontal-lobe mis-chord End my hope; cut my bind Load up on dope; what else to find Fuck my heart and forget something Hang from the door; your words mean nothing Seeping through the pores; thoughts are mental whores Red rain falling for truth; actions are uncouth Tears from a cloud; pretend you’re proud Fashion a new knife; pressure completes the life Fall apart into broken whole and true Forget your purposeful word; just watch the bird Self-hatred is true; look in the mirror, “fuck you” Self-fulfilling prophecy; internal clairvoyancy No tears left to hide; furious sky My honesty lied; season pay-no-mind Tangled in time; feast to dine Ignore the past; forget to cast Push the nail all through my skin Past the muscles, through to sin Shit on my brain; fuck my mind Kill this train; end my own kind Forget your life and enter something Dye your cord; your words mean nothing
6.
Heaven brings me closer to you Away from peace and towards the fool Like a beaten elephant loosely tied to a stick I’m not going anywhere, I’ve yet my trick In hell of my own creation Through to the tent of my imagination Like a whipped ring-master of a flea circus Take your opinions, destroy my esophagus Heaven brings me closer to you Away from peace and towards the fool Like a beaten elephant loosely tied to a stick I’m not going anywhere, I’ve yet my trick Hatred bred unto sheep Live in fear, eternal keep Lying is a paying business Seething while stealing realness Simple shelter, roots of wrong I’m not sure, rope looks long Explanation determination Never spiteful elation Pragmatic reasoning of actions Heartless religious factions Creativity stolen from the youth Dogmatic ideas are your truth Heaven brings me closer to you Away from peace and towards the fool Like a beaten elephant loosely tied to a stick I’m not going anywhere, I’ve yet my trick
7.
Flying is a construct of the mind Sleeping is a dream of a coma Bleeding, an invention of the body Dying is a creation of a life If I jump, will you catch me? If I cut, will you heal me? If I swing, will you lower me? If I die, will you help me? Spinning is a construct of the world Fainting is a creation of pressure Experience is an invention of a system Hurting, an occurrence of the living If you free me, am I still me? Does “myself” mean anything? Do I stand for something? Do I fall for nothing? Figment of imagination; I’m no longer living Questions left unanswered are facts; facts left unquestioned are lies Martyrdom is self-indulgence Suicide is an example GO!
8.
A#2 06:09
I feel myself fly up - all back from the abyss Another empty cup - I feel my own sweet kiss I fly above my head - I see myself so calm Peaceful like a body, dead - I know I won’t see dawn I know what’s coming now - I feel it in my heart But no more I can grow - a pin prick like a dart A bottle rests beside me - standing stretched and tall I know that I won’t be free - no matter how far I crawl Someone dies every second I guess I will be beckoned I don’t know the words to my sad song Even though I know it won’t be long I fall back to myself - I fall for miles I awake with a jolt - surrounded by my lies Though I think my mind’s a fiend - grab the bottle next to me Swallow all seventeen - you will sleep like a baby Someone dies every second I guess I will be beckoned I don’t know the words to my sad song Even though I know it won’t be long
9.
Demon 05:16
Goddamn, I trusted you; though you built our feud You never told the truth; fought the wrong side, bone and tooth Shared our true thoughts; turned my heart in knots Agreed with every word you said; didn’t know your mind was led I followed all your hopes and dreams Believed in all your selfish teens I know that you didn’t believe it I really turned, collect your spit You lied to her; you lied to us But we never took the time to make the honest fuss Your beliefs were wrong; you are not insane You do it all just for the fame I followed all your hopes and dreams Believed in all your selfish teens I know that you didn’t believe it I really turned, collect your spit I followed all your hopes and dreams Believed in all your selfish teens I know that you didn’t believe it I really turned, collect your spit I followed all your hopes and dreams Believed in all your selfish teens I know that you didn’t believe it I really turned, collect your spit
10.
Ask for everything when you can lose Soon you will, all that you can use Rose-tint my world in a shade of green Now you can’t speak, you are the queen Freedom is a point of view Your locked jail is true I do believe you owe me what’s due Freedom is a point of view The distance is minuscule Spacious difference is infinite There seems to be more space Between minds across the universe I will keep you hidden away For you’re molded straight from clay Oh my dearest, hopeless doll I will never allow you to fall Freedom is a point of view Your locked jail is true I do believe you owe me what’s due Freedom is a point of view My poetry is meaningless On the scale of everything There is more to life Than simple passing

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released February 27, 2024

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Hereditary SNAFU Chicago, Illinois

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