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I'll Be Civil [Divisible]

by Hereditary SNAFU

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1.
Entrepreneurial Suffering 02:52
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Can I close the door; Can I scream a little more Can I make myself sore; Can I bleed onto the floor Can I run away; Help me keep him at bay Can you save me, I'm a stray; Can you see that I'm in pain Leave it all alone; Can't I please go home God-dammit pick up the phone; Just leave it all alone The epitome of this week; Is a drowning anger physique Burning in this heat; I will fake it 'til I'm beat Fight me, tease me, fuck me, kill me I'm sorry my dear un-friend, you fell off the edge in the end I know that it was no one's fault, but still, I take your blame when caught Goodnight sweet prince of pain; hello sunshine, earth awake in vain Aside from you and your kin, you never cared for my old sin Fight me, tease me, fuck me, kill me
2.
Not One Fucking Answer 03:56
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Your rum dreams and coke lies are spewing from both your eyes. I see them every day, I hear them every night; I feel your pain just out of spite. I don't know if you'll be back tomorrow; I will wait and see. You say that you care if I cut my life, but you don't notice all my scars. You just want one; But I have none You just want one fucking answer But you have none Keep on digging and keep finding nothing; Complain and bitch for your bed is a ditch. I won't tell and I won't say; But I won’t let it go away. You can run to the north but not out your heart; Your past still haunts me to feel a part. If you peak behind the curtain you won't see; Your life left me capacity to bleed. You just want one; But I have none You just want one fucking answer But you have none As the belt tightens, the blood rushes in; The black closes as I feel my wrists, Contracting and swelling and flowing so smooth; My mind feels like a criminal sleuth. But I don't, I won't, the answer I will not say; Leave me be for a brand-new day. Now you have me searching, scared of what I'll find; I don't have any answers inside You just want one; But I have none You just want one fucking answer But you have none
3.
To The Beat 02:39
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Sit on down, like a savior of reign Let you feast as we begin to train Listen up, we are the gods of pain Come back tomorrow we will do the same Begin to see what we truly believe You're indoctrination, you are naive Now go forth, but never leave Commit these crimes for the god you conceive Escape into a world of sex; You're so young, yet so complex Swim into the Web vortex; But don't forget to use Kleenex Beat the meat - Meet the beat Young child, don't you see All that you can do for me Though you think you rape for free All your fucks belong to me I will not take the blame for you For it really is your choice to do Never try to kill me too An idea has been born anew Escape into a world of sex; You're so young, yet so complex Swim into the Web vortex; But don't forget to use Kleenex Beat the meat - Meet the beat Once you're done you'll feel remorse You'll never reject our true discourse And yet again you will be forced Yourself to beat your own dead-horse Beat and rape, it is your treat Because you are the true white meat Stomp and kick and punch, you bitch Shoot and kill and die, you bitch Escape into a world of sex; You're so young, yet so complex Swim into the Web vortex; But don't forget to use Kleenex Beat the meat - Meet the beat
4.
It's Just Not That Exciting 03:06
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Listen to the silence, bask in your alliance Stop changing subjects, you are the evil queen You were never special, and this is all a ruse Your non-existent clues, brain drowned benzene Rape your friends for hatred sends Kill the liars puts out fires Suck the venom, scold the denim Eat my heart, kill my part Fuck fair, this world ain’t just; Don’t end his life, he’s on the cusp It’s all inside, no emotional talk; Don’t worry the tide, the hate will walk Stay up ‘til 2, no 3, no 4; Set off the bombs, just a few more Celebrate the old illusion; Trust me and pay for second-hand fusion Rape your friends for hatred sends Kill the liars puts out fires Suck the venom, scold the denim Eat my heart, kill my part Wait, I’m still coming down; I’ll be home in a second, don’t let me drown Stop, I’ll stabilize soon; Please stop reciting the call of the fool Look up and see a new lie to hold; How could my subconscious be so bold My sweeping dark of liars unsaid; Aching to release the sugar-bed Wait, things will come into view; I get the feeling you hate me too Stop, please pause for my mind; I see the world, it’s so unkind Please don’t let me down, leave me a crown Don’t stop inciting the face of the drowned I get the feeling you already knew how to make me true I can see in my mind, mentally blind Rape your friends for hatred sends Kill the liars puts out fires Suck the venom, scold the denim Eat my heart, kill my part It’s just not that exciting White boys for the riots inciting Eat shit you, pedantic contrarian Follow along your social librarian
5.
Ashtray 05:43
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My life is done by your decisions, while I choose what to tell and say It all comes to me through all your visions, I'm an ashtray of yesterday I say what comes to my mind; only when you show your face On this road I simply cannot find; anywhere you have no trace I hear about all of your pain, and maybe you can't listen But while you suck up all the fame that you're given from your heaven In this old refrain of mine; I must find your state of mind You speak to me constantly; As I just try to break free As I walk the borderline; Between the real and life; As I cut mine with your knife I will walk the crisis line; Leaving behind my life; Eat your shit and fuck your knife The tension is lacking, as I hang from the racking I swing back and forth, my mind is contracting. The blood flows in as the lights go dim; My life is over, I won't take your shit. Is there something wrong with it? Fall away and make me limp I hear about all of your pain, and maybe you can't listen But while you suck up all the fame that you're given from your heaven In this old refrain of mine; I must find your state of mind As I walk the borderline; Between the real and life; As I cut mine with your knife I will walk the crisis line; Leaving behind my life; Eat your shit and fuck your knife I sleep away with my dreams in tow; I live alone in my head, spirits to lend I wait for you to make peace with yourself; I envy all their mental health Waiting, just waiting; New ideas begin to form Evil thoughts about to cry My blade shines a new shade of red; It flickers in and out of my spread I alone can see yourself; It’s just me and you to the end of the shelf Waiting, just waiting; New ideas begin to form Evil thoughts about to cry My life is done by your decisions; While I choose what to tell and say It comes to me through all of your visions; I'm an ashtray of yesterday I hear about all of your pain; And maybe you can't listen In this old refrain of mine; I must find your state of mind As I walk the borderline; Between the real and life; As I cut mine with your knife I will walk the crisis line; Leaving behind my life; Eat your shit and fuck your knife
6.
I'll Be Civil 03:12
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I guess I’ll sit down I guess I’ll stay around Lies feel much better in the dark My length’s immature My head’s no future Self-loathing seems to leave a mark Splitting bark Don’t father me Diaphragm diazepam Social existence scam Never seeing humans in the sea Fuck your easy living Disturbance hive beginning Listen for the thunder or the tree Feel the breeze Don’t father me My life can be so meaningless So, my mind can rest to please Existing for just trying less Your civility exists at ease Don’t father me
7.
Wrong 03:51
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I feel so alone; I feel so bored My brain won’t relax; my heart acts like a fort I don’t want to disappoint; I expect nothing less I want to live more; but I couldn’t care less Floating along; with my hateful self Eating away; with my internal bells Intestines growl; with malice amid My brain continues; to raise the bid Are you sure, Are you sure; Nothing feels right but nothing is wrong All feels like art with contrived along Are you sure, Are you sure; Nothing feels right and nothing is clean Everything is wrong and nothing is mean Don’t leave me Don’t hate me Abandon me Don’t tell me I’m wrong Hatred rings truth inside of youth; My neck ignores flailing loose Open wings of deletion compiled; My brain must need to be tried Fixation and pressure; so happy together Anxiety and fashion; weighing a feather Tension and fainting; seem to be near Just simply ignore; my immature tear Are you sure, Are you sure; Nothing feels right but all is deemed My life is a pit and to hiss is a dream Don’t leave me Don’t hate me Abandon me Don’t tell me I’m wrong Hatred rings truth inside of youth; My neck ignores flailing loose Open wings of deletion compiled; My brain must need to be tried
8.
Vertical For Effectiveness 05:34
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I'm going insane; I can't see straight anymore I'm going insane; I feel my mind walk out the door I'm going insane; There's others than me I'm going insane; But you're too inane to see Don’t lie to yourself You know we're here to help, pathetic excuse for self-help We mean you no harm, you're too weak to own a firearm I'll let the red rain fall, as the clouds roll in I let my organs cry as I hear the screams of sin Nobody is watching, my mental state is reproaching I am seeing double in my mind, don't ever think me to be unkind I'll wash it all away with the sanity of my brain Don’t wait for me, don’t wait for me Look at me; I am here for you Look at me; We are here for you Look at me; Don't worry about anything Look at me; Your life doesn't need repeating Don't look away We can protect you; we will save you from the world. I know it may seem dark; but your eyes can be unfurled Don't hang the belt, don't down the pills Leave yourself for slaughter the blackened stills Nobody is watching, my mental state is reproaching I am seeing double in my mind, don't ever think me to be unkind The annals of history will not cry for you Don’t cry for me, don’t cry for me Even though your dreams aren't true, we'll keep up with you With undying trust, never ending lust But we will, we really care about you I guess all I've heard is wrong, I don't know what to do I've got nowhere to turn to, but maybe to you
9.
Servitutem Honestatis/Chernobog's Siesta [Insp. M. Mussorgsky & H. Bosch] 04:30
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10.
All I Never Wanted 05:15
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When I drove back home from yours; I feared what he had taken from those Maybe you told be a fable; Or maybe it was him being unstable My selfish brain lashes out; Why couldn’t I know, casting doubt Were we ever really friends; Was I a scapegoat for loose split-ends The rest of us all dragged along; For we really never displayed strong We misfits, but un-special time; My perfect, selfish, vacant mind Unspecified emotional pain; But fear is always feigned Only you who contradicts true; Eating soul, consume taboo How fucking selfish of me; To constantly presume myself to be One you could trust so honestly; I know now you only lied to me You stole a story to be told; I presumed to be a confidant so bold We planned on being close as we grew old; But I was alone when I consoled I’m the one who is wrong; I challenged the end, not all along Stayed around to help someone else; But escaped all from your mess Kaleidoscope eyes, solipsistic synergy You never loved what I could be Fed me lies, stifled my cries Ignored all that you did see Can I live alone anymore; Will I run away, eat the floor I still remember more than I should; My pain marked in purple blood Your plans were not seen through; I’m sure my brain is blue Flying away at the speed of sound; Lying for the priced pound Kaleidoscope eyes, solipsistic synergy You never loved what I could be Fed me lies, stifled my cries Ignored all that you did see

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released February 1, 2023

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Hereditary SNAFU Chicago, Illinois

Fully independent artist and musician.


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